In Memory of Jocelyn

I will always remember Jocelyn...

Jocelyn with her backward baseball caps, her tattoos which she proudly displayed, her big golden dog which she'd bring into the station, and her quick smile.

Jocelyn was murdered. Stabbed on a college campus in Colorado and left bleeding, left to die.

I remember Jocelyn as if I last saw her yesterday. She was a DJ at WCBE Radio, a small college-affiliated National Public Radio station I interned at over the summer of 1995 in Columbus, Ohio.

Jocelyn came out to me on one of the first nights I served as her radio show assistant, shelving CDs in the music library. She told me she was gay and I remember thinking, "what confidence she has in who she is, what comfort in her own skin." I admired her for that - Jocelyn was someone who didn't hide herself from the world.

Some might say that's what got her into trouble. She fit the tom-boy stereotype of the "tough lesbian" - the ball caps, the big t-shirts, the tattoos. Whatever, I thought it was funny that some of the websites reporting her murder hinted it was a hate-crime, while others didn't mention it. I sent out some emails and learned the case remains unsolved.

In any case, I thought about Jocelyn the other day. Wanted to see what she was up to. So I started searching the web for her email address. A few years ago, I'd heard she'd moved out west and figured she was working at another radio station. Instead, I came across the Jocelyn Sandburg Memorial Page. (You can click here to see another.)

And I suddenly remembered the green-blue-yellow parrot feathers she'd given me when I left Ohio for New York City. She'd told me they'd protect me, bring me luck.

I guess she needed them too.